So, I haven’t made a personal blog post about myself in over 4 months. Yeah, I literally dropped off the face of the planet when I got pregnant with my third. Surprise (to those of you who didn’t know)!

So let’s time hop back to mid August 2016. I knew I was pregnant but it was too soon for me to tell anyone, including my coach. I had to go on with life as normal. But I was miserable. I was still training because I had two races left on my calendar for the year. The first was a ½ marathon at Mesa Falls, and another one was a women’s 5k.

Since Mesa Falls was on it’s 20th marathon anniversary, the race directors decided to fly in two super famous runners - Sara and Ryan Hall. I wasn’t expecting either of them to race (I just thought they were going to be present at all of the events). Come to find out, Sara decided to race the ½ marathon with Ryan as her pacer. I was already registered to do the ½, so I couldn’t back out on account of cold feet.

But I was totally underprepared for a 13 mile race at high altitude. Training for a steeplechase on the track is one thing, but to completely change gears and hope to race a decent ½ marathon one month later didn’t seem like a sane thing to do (especially considering I took a 2 week break from running following the Olympic Trials).

Still, I decided to suck it up and hope for the best. Everyone told me that Mesa Falls was a very technical race. But by looking at a topographical map, I couldn’t figure out why everyone claimed it was so difficult. On the map, it shows 4 miles of downhill, followed by a 2 mile uphill, followed by another long downhill into the finish line. Easy enough, right? Not so.

Here’s what the map doesn’t show: the first 4 miles are on on sandy/rocky trail. So there is no advantage to be gained in that downhill portion of the race. Then the uphill is deceiving - it curves around the side of a canyon, so you can’t tell where to top is. Every time you think you’ve made the ascent, it keeps going up. Once you finally get out of the canyon, the roads turn into rollercoasters (constant up and down) until the last three miles of the race, which is flat. The last portion of the race is nice except for a strong Idaho headwind that constantly blows from the southwest directly onto the racecourse.

All things aside, my goal was to keep Sara Hall in my sights. But Sara’s race strategy is much different from my own because she always starts out fast. If you know me, I am the complete opposite - I love a slow, steady start. So when Sara busted out a sprint the first 800m of the race, I had already lost her. But by the time she settled into her pace I was finally able to keep up (although I was 200m back). All was well until 2 miles before the finish line when my shoe fell off.  It took me some fumbling around to finally get it back on, and by then I had lost precious time. But I was ok with that. I had given it my best shot and kept with Sara for as long as I could. When I finished I was blown away with my time. I was hoping to run under 1:26, but I surprised myself with a 1:18!!! Side note: I don’t like to look at my watch during a race because it often messes with my mentality, so I didn’t know how fast I was running until I saw my time at the finish.

Not bad for being pregnant and sick, right (on top of losing my shoe and not really training for a ½ marathon)? I totally thought I could keep up my luck for the next race, but I was wrong. The week following the ½ marathon I was so sick I could barely get out of bed. I still went to cross country practice every day and attempted to run, but threw up all the time. In order to mask how bad I was feeling for the 5k race I decided to push Logan and Charlotte in my double stroller. I still ended up faster than I expected (19:45 pushing two kids), so I was grateful for that. But the week following  the 5k I had to stop running completely because my body couldn’t handle it. I wasn’t keeping enough nutrients down to have the energy to run anymore.

I was so frustrated with myself because I had been able to run just fine when I was pregnant with Logan and Charlotte. And I didn’t get sick with either one of them until later in my first trimester. This pregnancy I was sick before I could even test positive. I didn’t know what was different with this one. Everything was making me sick, and the normal ‘remedies’ for morning sickness only increased my nausea. My nausea was so bad that even drinking water made me sick.

This is THE ONLY picture taken of me in my first trimester.

I felt so crummy that I didn't care about taking pictures of my baby bump.

The only reason I have this picture is because my kids were playing around on my phone.

And yes, I'm in my PJs because that's pretty much what I wore all day every day because I was so sick.

Finally, Tim was so concerned after one day when I was only able to drink 6oz of water that he sent me to the doctor. During my visit, my Dr. diagnosed me with what I dreaded.... Hyperemesis Gravidarum. In a nutshell, HG is severe morning sickness on steroids. Many women with HG have to be given IVs and feeding tubes in order to get nutrients, liquid, and medicine in their bodies. My Dr. recommended the same for me but I wanted to try so see what I could do on my own first. It came down to one option: broth. For 3 weeks, broth was my diet. I had it 3-5 times a day and could only take small sips at a time. Picture this: It took me 1 hour to drink 8 oz of broth because if I drank it any faster I would end up throwing it all up. Several times I tried broth with noodles, but that went to waste too. My no carb diet meant no running either. Actually, that’s a bit of an understatement... I could barely walk around without seeing stars, and I couldn’t go up stairs without the fear of passing out. The worst part was that no medication worked for me. And my sense of smell was so repulsive that if Charlotte pooped her diaper I had to wait for Tim to come home from work to change her because I couldn’t handle it.

After 3 weeks of broth I was starting to feel slightly better so I transitioned to watered down soup with vegetables. I still couldn’t eat meat or noodles with my soup (they were too complex for my stomach to digest). Finally I was able to slowly transition back to solid food. Since then, every food I have tried is trial and error. My body definitely isn’t the same as it was before I got pregnant. My digestive system has been so messed up that it is likely that I have developed a gluten and a lactose intolerance. My doctor can’t promise that those problems will go away after I have the baby either (I may have a gluten and lactose problem for the rest of my life, but right now I’m going to hope for the best). I did hope that my nausea would disappear, but my doctor said that if I was sick through 24 weeks, it’s likely I’ll be sick the remainder of the pregnancy. Well, I’m at 29 weeks and I’m still sick all day long (so here’s to 11 more weeks of being sick). I keep wondering if I’m just being a big baby. But then I remind myself that I’m not. When I was expecting Logan and Charlotte I definitely did not feel the way I do for this pregnancy. HG is a completely different realm, and should never be compared to normal pregnancies. Yes, I have survived this far, but I don’t know if I ever want to experience it again.

For those of you who have never been educated on HG, here is a little chart that provides a comparison with ‘normal’ morning sickness.

So here’s my self-diagnosis following this chart:

Severe weight loss - Yes. I lost 7 lbs of weight in one week (which is a lot for someone my size).

Severe Nausea and vomiting - Yes. I could eat very little (i.e. broth) and was constantly dehydrated.

Vomit bile - Yes. Basically throwing up even when there’s nothing left in my stomach. It tastes awful.

Dietary lifestyles - No. I didn’t not accept IV treatment because I was able to find an alternate solution (broth). Looking back, I realize I should have taken the IVs in order to get better nutrients to myself and the baby, as well as more fluid to keep me from getting dehydrated.

Duration of nausea - Yes. I’m still sick all day long every day.

Ability to function - I was completely incapacitated for my first trimester and the beginning of my second trimester. Family support was much needed. I had to stop attending my job as assistant cross country coach.

So there you have it. That’s my condition in a nutshell - sorry if it grosses you out. All these symptoms are similar for most women with HG, although each woman with HG may experience different symptoms (such as my gluten and lactose intolerance).

You can imagine my delight when my Dr. finally gave me the ‘ok’ to start running again. I’ve only been running for 6 weeks, but here’s what I’ve discovered. Oh boy am I slow! When you add on a few pounds of baby weight in a few short months, it’s hard to counteract. I’ve accepted the fact that I’m definitely not as fast as I was 6 1/2 months ago (like 2 minutes slower per mile). But the good news is, I still have my stamina/endurance. I just have to deal with the pain (yes, running with a big belly really hurts), but it’s nothing I can’t handle. So what’s on my calendar next? The coaches 1600 at the Simplot Games. It’ll be a hoot. If you want to watch a 6 ½ month pregnant girl race, then mark your calendars for February 18th at the Holt Arena.

The credit for the blog post goes 100% to my sister, Sydney Christensen. She is a DIY extraordinaire!  I couldn't think of anything to post for this month so she came to my rescue - and it was perfectly timed for Halloween as well. So, here is her amazing advice on how to make the best getup for your little girl for the holiday...

"Halloween is right around the corner, and I’ve got a fantastic, low cost solution to that question in the back of your mind: ‘What is my little girl going to dress up like for Halloween?’

Ready for this? Remember that cute Disney movie Tangled that every girl fell in love with a few years back. Well if you’re like me, chances are you’ve somehow acquired a Rapunzel dress for your daughter around the same time that she would request to watch it repetitiously, day after day for months. And if you don’t have one, I’ll almost guarantee your neighbor down the road does, and would be willing to let you borrow it. Those fantastic costume companies make their costumes one size fits all, so you should be good to go in the costume department.

But a purple and pink dress does not a Rapunzel make. Her beautiful tresses are all but impossible to duplicate… until now! And it gets even better! You can create your own Rapunzel hair for… wait for it… FIVE DOLLARS.

WHAAAAAAAAT?

That’s right! Just $5 and a nearby Dollar Tree, and you will be set to have the happiest and cutest princess as your companion Halloween night.

Before I get started with the instructions, I have a little disclaimer. We will be working with a LOT of hair. It’s not human hair either, so you can’t just brush out the tangles. Therefore, if you are the type of person who can’t handle touching messy, Tangled (yes I totally intended that pun) hair, just close this blog and walk away.

If you’re a brave soul still reading this, let’s get started! You will need:

• ·         4 blonde fake hair pieces from the Dollar Tree - $4 (I’m not sure if these are stocked on a year-round basis. I checked multiple stores earlier this year for a different project (Princess Leia hair). None of them had any in stock and the managers weren’t sure if they would be brought back. Imagine my excitement when I found them again last week!)
• ·         A bunch of dollar store flowers - $1
• ·         Hot glue gun and glue sticks
• ·         Scissors
• ·         Mini hair bands – ideally transparent or blonde to be inconspicuous in the hair
• ·         *optional – heat knife
• ·         *optional – ball approximately the size of your child’s head

Literally the hardest part of this whole project is separating three out of the four hair pieces from their headbands. I’m not sure what kind of adhesive is holding that hair on, but that stuff is stronger than Super Glue and Gorilla Glue mixed together. Who’d have expected such strong adhesive from a dollar store product? Not me! This is where the heat knife comes into play. My method was to slide that blade between the hair and the headband, trying to melt the headband and adhesive away from the hair. If you try this, be so careful to keep the loose hair strands away from the heat because they are just plastic and will melt right off. Sorry for no picture of this process, I wasn’t brave or talented enough to take a picture while trying to hold the heat knife. Perhaps the tip of the hot glue gun will work to melt the headband too, but I didn’t try it, so good luck!

 This is the hair after I melted the headband away from it

Luckily once you get some of the hair separated from the headband, it’s easy to pull the rest off.

The next step is to clean up the ends by cutting off the ribbon binding and then gluing the ends so that they don’t come apart.

Repeat this process with two more hair pieces. Make sure to leave the remaining one attached to its headband. This is what things should look like so far:

Now if you’ve got a beach ball, it will be helpful for the remaining steps. If you look at this next picture, I’ve positioned the headband on the ball, but I didn’t to a very good job. The headband is resting right where my daughter’s ears would be if this were really her head (I didn’t think that through). So you’ll want to make sure yours is a little farther back if possible. Mine still turned out alright, but it created a slight bagginess to the sides of the finished product.

These hair pieces don’t have much hair all by themselves. In order to make it so your Rapunzel doesn’t look like she’s balding, we need to double up some of the hair. So take one piece of hair that you’ve separated from the headband, and we’re going to glue it to the top of the one still connected to the headband.

Purely for aesthetic purposes I overlapped ends of the second hair piece with some strands of the first so that the cut off braid doesn’t look tacky. But the best part of this project is that you will place flowers all over it at the end, so if there is any spot that looks less than lovely, problem solved!

Next we are going to braid the hair that will extend behind the ears. Grab a decent amount like so:

And braid loosely, tying off after about 5 inches with a hair band.

This next step is a skill that I’ve seen in many hairstyles making their way around the internet. You need to tug some of the strands out of each layer of the braid, starting at the top. This will make the braid look fuller and give the impression that there is more hair than there actually is. You will need this skill for the large braid down the back, so if my explanation has you confused, I’ve found this short YouTube video by Hannah Shanae that will hopefully help out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76oxub5MlfQ Start watching at 1:55.

Here is the first tug.

And this is what it should look like when you’ve loosened everything.

Repeat to the other side.

It is important to glue the hair in place once you get it the way you like it. Throughout this whole project I glued the underside of the braids in the creases to make sure the hair doesn’t get ruined if it gets tugged on.

Next we’re going to use the curvature of the ball to set the top of the hair to sit nicely over the back of the head. If you don’t have a ball, you can probably use your daughter’s head, but don’t get her hair caught with Rapunzel’s. Leaving out the braids and about 1.5-2 inches of hair above them, pull the top hair to the back, finger combing tangles out, and tie with a hair band.

Now we’re going to add the other two pieces of hair.

I didn’t add them directly to the banded hair in the back. Instead I banded and glued them to the remaining loose hair strands of hair. I suggest you just glue the hair and skip the hair band step. It was way too much work to maneuver that much hair through the hair band, and wasn’t worth it. Gluing the additional hair just a few inches away from the middle-back hair band will allow the large braid to start out wide, giving it a fuller appearance.

I brought the loose side hair under the braid and banded the additional bunch of hair to it. I then glued around the band, which, silly me, melted the hair band and snapped it. But the glue held, so no harm done. I do suggest hiding the glued portion underneath the behind-the-ear braid and gluing it in place.

Now we need to separate three groups of hair in order to begin our main braid. This next picture is complicated so I will break it down for you. The middle group of hair, which I have banded together to keep it contained, includes the main first band of hair, as well as small amounts of hair from the side additions (see the portions of hair I am holding in the previous picture). It is crucial to add the amounts from the side for two reasons. First, the additional hair is heavy, so if it’s not secured in multiple areas, it will come unglued. Second, the added hair is now longer than the middle hair bunch, so you will need to include the longer strands in the middle bunch in order for it to reach to the bottom. (I still found that this bunch was shorter than the others, so I had to inconspicuously borrow longer strands from the other bunches periodically through the braiding process).

The two side bunches include the remainder of the hair you just added, as well as the loose braids from behind the ears, which you will cross over and include in the bunch on the opposite side from where it started.

We can finally get to braiding the long hair down Rapunzel’s back! I braided a few inches down, temporarily banded the braid, and went back to loosen up the hair strands and glue them together before continuing. REMEMBER to glue the underside to hold the strands in the place you want them.

In this next picture you can see the top length of hair (on the right) has been loosened and looks thicker. I’ve braided a few more inches down and am about to loosen those bunches. You will start to have the shorter lengths of hair ending now, so once you get the hair loosened the way you like it, you can glue the ends that stick out to the underside of the braid.

Another thing you will run into is the ending of the smaller braids in the bunches containing the additional hair pieces. I wanted the braid look to continue, so I braided a small amount of hair right at the end of the other. Don’t use too much hair in the small braids, since the hair going into the large main braid is thinning out rapidly.

At this point towards the bottom, the loosening of the main braid is key in keeping the full appearance that is prevalent at the top.

Once you have braided to within a few inches of the end, band the hair tightly. This is the part where we get to cover up any weird looking places with beautiful flowers so no one knows what mix-ups lie beneath.

The best and last step is to reveal the finished beautiful hair to your daughter and commit her delighted reaction to memory before allowing her to rush of into her bedroom to change into her Rapunzel dress and then beg you to let her wear the hair (which it is heavy enough that I would definitely suggest pinning it in so that it doesn’t keep slipping off her head).

And of course I have to include pictures of my own daughter walking around like she is the real Rapunzel (even note the bare-feet!)."

9/4/2016

I don’t know if every runner is the same as me, but running is my ‘out’ for each day. It is literally my cool down/de-stressing/one-on-one time with myself. As such, I often spend most of my time reflecting when I go for a run. Sometimes I put my grocery list together, figure out my schedule for the week, write speeches in my head, work on my Sunday sharing time lesson, put my to-do list together, etc... During one particular run last week I was able to contemplate the beauty of the world around me and feel God’s love for everything he has blessed me with. I hear of people who spend their entire lives trying to fulfill their dreams, but I realized that I am already living my dream. As a little girl I fantasized on what my future would be like, and what I would want to do when I got older. This was my list:

1. Be a stay at home mother
2. Marry the best man on the face of the planet
3. Be a coach for Skyline High School
4. Live in the house where I grew up
5. Be an ordinance worker in the Idaho Falls Temple
6. Qualify for the Olympic Trials

Our family pictures last year

Done and done, although I know my story doesn’t end there. Life is always full of changes and struggles, but at this point in my life I can be grateful that my dreams have been fulfilled thus far.

Admittedly, when I was in my early years of college I thought I would end up an old maid because I didn’t believe there was a ‘Mr. Right’ for me. And if I couldn’t find ‘Mr. Right’, I wouldn’t have kids, so I couldn’t be a stay at home mother. And if I didn’t have kids, I’d probably move far away to find a job, thus, I couldn’t coach at Skyline, and I couldn’t live in the house where I grew up. As such, I consoled myself to the fact that I would get a degree in archaeology, then work in Central/South America, Greece, or Italy excavating and studying ancient runes. If that were the case, I would be far away from the Idaho Falls Temple (so I couldn’t be an ordinance worker), and I likely wouldn’t be able to spend time running (to qualify for the Olympic Trials). And just like that, my childhood dreams would waft out the window :) All things aside, I knew that being an archaeologist wasn’t conducive to family life, so I chose to get a degree in education in the hopes that I would indeed find ‘Mr. Right’ and have a family. Now that I have married my Mr. Right, have two wonderful children, and a degree in education, I can see the wonderful benefits my education has provided me as a mother.

First: I am qualified to ‘home preschool’ my children. Please note: I still haven’t decided whether I will homeschool them or send them to public school when they are older. Regardless, I am a very conventional person and I believe that children learn best through personal experience and hands-on exploration. So most of Logan’s and Charlotte’s education takes place as they work alongside me. They love to help me in the morning when I weed the garden, pick fruits or vegetables, pick flowers, water plants, bake food, can food, do laundry, do the dishes, clean up toys, vacuum and sweep the floor, mow the lawn, rake pine needles, set the table for meals, etc... The best part is, I don’t force them to help - they beg me to let them help. Then when most of the work is done, they play, take naps, and go to cross country practice with me. I also take about 30 minutes every day to read to my children (15 minutes before naps and 15 minutes before bedtime). Although they enjoy it when I read books to them, I haven’t forced them to learn how to read by themselves. When the time comes I know they will ask me to teach them to read, write, do math, etc… But right now, I can let them be little kids who love to help and listen to stories.

My little country girl Logan and Charlotte helped save a bird from drowning in our pond

Second: If anything should ever happen to where I need to go into the workforce, I have a degree that can literally get me hired almost instantaneously (especially in Idaho where highly qualified/certified teachers are sometimes difficult to come by). In fact, when I went into the principal’s office at Skyline High School a few weeks ago to have him sign some papers for me, he literally tried to hire me when he found out I had a teaching certificate. When I turned him down (because I believe Skyline already has the best history teachers in Idaho - and I don’t need to ruin their good streak), he tried to convince me to at least become a substitute teacher. I graciously turned him down again and admitted that I preferred to be a stay at home mother. But at least I know I am always needed should the necessity arise.

Third: Getting a degree has prepared me to be a better coach. There were so many invaluable lessons I learned in college that gave me the necessary tools for coaching. I actually tried to earn a minor in coaching, but after my first semester in that field I was informed that it wasn’t allowed with my major in history (unless I wanted to get a double minor, which I didn’t). So I got a minor in Political Science instead. I can’t begin to describe how the invaluable information I gain in Political Science has made me a more productive/involved member of my community. Following that experience I realized that good can even come out of something I didn’t initially plan for.

While most of my childhood dreams have been fulfilled, I still have several dreams on my bucket list for when I am older, after Tim is retired, such as;

1. Serve as a couple missionary and go on several missions
2. Work in the temple again
3. Visit Europe
4. Spend time with kids, grandkids, and great grandkids
5. Run until the day I die, but still have room for my sweet tooth

Running is my best justification for having seconds, or thirds, or even eating the whole pan of dessert, and it works!

And I’m sure my list will continue to grow, but for now I can be satisfied with where God has taken me, and strive to continue to fulfill His plan for me.

I've been avoiding writing in my blog the past few months because I was afraid that I might jinx myself if I wrote anything down. Now that I've achieved my dream to run in the Olympic Trials I find it easier to spill everything out.

So, waaaaaaay back in April I signed up to run at the San Francisco State Distance Carnival. I almost missed the start of the race though.... When I showed up at SF State I was so nervous that I lollygagged for half an hour. By the time I got warmed up, the officials had all the runners lined up and were about to shoot the gun. I hadn't even gotten my spikes on! Thank goodness they were nice and waited for me. All was well until the 3rd lap of the race when someone spiked the back of my heel going over a barrier. I was caught in midair and the force of the contact threw me to my back and I slid several feet on the track, narrowly missing other runners who could have easily landed on me as they hurdled the barrier. All I could think was 'I have to get up and finish this race - I didn't come all this way to let everything go to waste!' I struggled getting back on my feet but I knew I had to shake it off and stay focused. Everyone had passed me by the time I started again so the rest of the race was spent chasing everyone down. I wasn't sure how the race was going to end up but I found renewed energy the last few laps and I was able to make a comeback and finish 2nd overall. My time was comparable to what I ran my senior year at ISU. I was shocked! I didn't realize I had improved so much after giving birth to two kids. I kept shaking off the feeling, thinking that it was just luck. I didn't think I could ever run that fast again. But my Dad reminded me that I had lost quite a bit of time because of my fall, so maybe I could run even faster!

One of my battle scars from my fall Golden Gate Bridge

I set my sights on the Mt. Sac Relays in Southern California but, because I'm a procrastinator, I missed the registration deadline. I was so upset with myself because I didn't know where else I could run against good competition. I emailed the race director in the hopes that they could still get me registered. When I didn't hear back from him I had no hope that I would get in. My sweet husband, Tim, emailed everyone he could think of who has running connections to see if they could use their influence to speak to the race director and get me registered. Thank goodness for wonderful people in this world (especially Coach Fehr from U of M, Coach Nielsen from ISU, and Coach Walker and Coach Pilkington from Weber State), I was able to weasel my way into the race. This time I made sure to check in way in advance, and show up at the start line on time. The only thing I really remember from my experience at Mt. Sac was how much pain I was in, and how much I despised the smell of funnel cakes wafting onto the track (which were being sold at the concession stand next to the 100m line, and made me feel sick during the last half of my race). Regardless, I came away with a lifetime personal best, which was only 13 second off of the Olympic Trials qualifying standard. Up until this point, I had always thought that making it to the Olympic Trials was just a dream and could never become reality. But when I saw how close I was to making it there, I had the ambition to keep racing and trying harder to qualify.

The 'hip' Brooks tent at Mt. Sac

My next stop was Hayward Field at Track Town USA (Eugene, OR), for the Oregon Twilight. I tried to race at that meet last year but I ended up getting sick so I had to throw in my towel. Needless to say, I was so glad I was able to make it this year. I had a bitter taste in my mouth from the last time I raced at Hayward Field in 2011 - it was the very last race of my college career, the NCAA Regional Championships. I had aspired to qualify for the NCAA championships, but everyone ran better than I did that day and I didn't make it. It was a horrible closure to my time at ISU because I had so many wonderful things happen while I was a Bengal. Maybe that bitter taste provided a good incentive for me to return to competitive running and to prove that good things could still happen at Hayward Field. Sure enough, I ran another lifetime best, placed first, and was within reaching distance of the trials standard - and the bitter taste was gone.

Oregon Twilight

Somehow I sprained my ankle during that race so I had to take a week off to let it heal. I missed the opportunity to run at other high performance meets while I was getting back into shape and I began to think that I might miss my opportunity to go to the trials altogether. Again, thank goodness for wonderful people in this world - in a moment of desperation (when I thought there were no more meets to enter), I got in contact with a good friend and fellow runner, Amber Henry-Schultz (Weber State grad, Club Northwest/Brooks). She had a pile load of information that she willingly and selflessly shared with me, which helped me get into the Harry Jerome Track Classic in Vancouver, Canada. My wonderful Aunt Mona was my personal chauffer the entire trip - she drove me everywhere, fed me, gave me a place to stay, cheered for me, and absolutely spoiled me (even though it was her birthday and she should have been the one to be spoiled!). I hadn't been to Canada since I was in Junior High so I was super excited to visit again. When I showed up at the track, I was completely caught by surprise when I saw that the steeple pit was on the outside of the track (rather than on the inside like standard tracks). I had only run on a track with an outside steeple pit once in my life and I didn't remember how it went. Thank goodness for Amber again! She came to my rescue and told me how many laps we were running, where the start line was, and where we were supposed to check in - I would have been lost without her! Because of her help I was completely calm when I toed the line at Swangard Stadium. I didn't have any expectations going into the race except that I would try my hardest and be grateful regardless of the outcome. Just a side note- when I race I don't like to hear or see my splits because sometimes it can be debilitating and take my focus off the race. So when I heard the officials yelling out the splits each lap I was super disappointed with how slow I was going. I felt like I was trying so hard without any improvement, so I kept pushing myself even harder. Not only that but I was having a horrible technical race - my hurdling was totally off, and I bombed every water jump. I thought I was going to get my slowest time of the season, but when I crossed the line with 400 meters remaining and saw the clock read 8:31, I knew I had a chance to meet the qualifying standard for the trials (which is a 9:53). Even though every muscle in my body burned I sprinted like my life depended on it, and crossed the line in 2nd place with a 9:51. I was so exhausted that I fell to the ground and was absolutely sick to my stomach. I didn't even know what my official time was until Amber came to help me up. Even though she was tired from the race she stayed with me until I felt good enough to walk, then she took me to the med tent (come to find out she's a nurse!). Just another fact about Amber - she ran her fastest time since college at the Harry Jerome Track Classic, even though she was stuck in bed for 2 weeks prior to the race because of an illness - that's amazing and inspiring!

Harry Jerome Track Classic

When I finally got a chance to myself that evening I was still in shock at what had just happened. I just cried for joy and thanked God for His hand in my life. Without God none of this could have been possible. My Coach Sean Schmidt shared a scripture with me the morning before I raced - "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6). I could entirely see that scripture come to fruition in my life, especially considering all the stumbling blocks I'd experienced the past few months, I knew that if I trusted God that he would direct my life. I just never thought my life would be directed all the way to the Olympic Trials. I was extremely humbled and grateful for the opportunity to go back to Eugene and race in the biggest track meet of my life.

The weeks leading up to the Olympic Trials were difficult. It seemed like my legs and muscles didn’t want to respond during training. And no matter how well I stretched, I could not get my calves or hamstrings to loosen up. They were so tight that it hurt to run. If anyone knows me, they also know that I am the least flexible person on the face of the planet - no joke. I’m so inflexible that the athletic trainers at ISU told me they had never seen someone as inflexible as me. And I was told several times that I would never do the steeplechase because I couldn’t do the L-7 stretch (hurdler stretch). Regardless of how I was feeling, I tried to stay positive and hope that by the time the trials came along, the tightness in my muscles would be gone. I wasn’t going to miss the opportunity to race in the Olympic Trials, even if I came in last place.

The day of my race came and my muscles were still so tense. I tried to push my negative thoughts aside and focus on the positive. But all of my emotions came spilling out as I walked out onto the track at Hayward Field for my race. I felt so grateful, amazed, and extremely overwhelmed at how gracious God had been in helping me make it to the Trials. I’m not usually a crier, but I was getting so choked up that I could hardly breath. I tried to control my emotions but my tears kept resurfacing. Finally I was able to calm down by the time the officials lined us up. Before the race started I knew the pace was going to be fast, but once the gun went off I found myself struggling to stay with the pack. On the first water jump I was tripped going over the barrier and I almost landed on my face coming out of the water. Luckily I was able to stay upright, but I had lost precious time and I had a hard time getting refocused. My muscles felt like they were in fire but I didn’t want this race to be a flop so I just pushed through it. By the time the last lap came I had nothing left in the tank. I was so happy to just be able to finish. Although I had aspired to qualify for finals, I placed 9th in my heat, but with my 2nd fastest time ever. I knew I shouldn’t be upset with myself. I gave everything I had, and I had achieved my dream.

A cool new heat press temporary bib number

Start line of the 3,000m Steeplechase

One of the few photos where I don't look like I'm in pain

One of my Dad’s coworkers (who is a statistician) was watching the race. He ran the numbers and told my Dad that the heat I was in was the fastest, most competitive heat EVER run at the Olympic trials. So even though I placed 9th out of 12, in any other heat I would have averaged 6th place. Coming into the trials I was ranked 30th out of 36. When all the times were put together I was 22nd, so I had moved up quite a few places. I felt extremely blessed. And in order to keep with tradition I ran to Pre’s Rock for my cool down. After all, who knows if and when I’ll ever be back to Hayward Field?

Pre's Rock

Several people have asked me - what now? What am I going to do with my life? Well, I'm going to keep racing! Although the Olympic Trials was my highest running aspiration, it is not an end to my running career. I intend to continue running for the rest of my life (as long as my body will allow). I love the thrill of racing and training. Yes, it is difficult, but the rewards that come from hard work are totally worth the effort. Of course, family will always be my first priority and Tim and I hope to have more children in the future. Until then I can do other things I’ve always wanted to do: a race walk, a ½ marathon, a full marathon (for real, not just for fun like I’ve done in the past), trail races, and maybe an ultra? The sky's the limit!

I can't begin to describe the amount of support that everyone has shown me the past few months. I'm so grateful for my community cheering me on, my family and friends for sending me inspiring messages and thoughts, my team for their wonderful friendship, Bill's Bike and Run and Teton Toyota for going out of their way to support me all the way to the Trials, and of course my husband and my kids for giving me a purpose to run.

Just a tribute to those of you who aspired to make it to the Olympic Trials, who deserved it much more than me - may your dreams still come true <3